Category: Love

This is love

This is loveThis is Love

Love comes to us in many forms, beyond the obvious, beyond a lover, a child, or a pet.

Love is also captured by the subtleties of nature, the rhythm of life which occurs outside our windows and the constants, the rising and setting of the sun, the seasons.

Love can be experienced in your body as it sustains your life without your interference.

Love is also experienced in a moment in time, when everything just feels right, it does not need to dramatic, all is required is your presence.

If your presence gets drawn away, then the moment is missed.

Genuine love is experienced in the present, when there are no distractions.

Let us take a journey together experiencing love:

Sitting with a child on my lap, caressing my polished nails, this is love

While the sand embraces our bodies, this is love

As the air encircles us and enters our lungs, this is love

Her hair so soft and yellow, blowing in the wind touching my face, this is love

The moment of silence when no words are needed, this is love

Our skin touching one another, as the sea gulls fly above, this is love

Salty smells, sticky skins and sand between our toes, this is love

Sound of the waves crashing on the shore, while being enraptured by a child, this is love

Blue skies, fluffy clouds that watch from above, this is love

Suns rays warming the skin on a winter day, this is love

Older skin merging with the softness of unblemished skin, this is love.

Hearts both receiving love from one another, this is love

Love surrounds, envelops, and embraces us from everywhere.

A child is love and all else that plays a part in that moment is love.

Love is captured in the sun, the wind and the air, as in the waves, the sand, and the salty sting left on the skin.

This is love

 

Recipe: This is Love Meditation

This is love meditation takes you on a journey through your senses, drawing you closer to rhythm of life which surrounds you.

Love comes from within, but also from outside of you. When you are caught up in your headspace, you not only lose out on the energy within in your body, but also the energy that touches your body.

Now take a moment and sit quietly wherever you are; on a park bench, on the beach, on a bus, a passenger in the car…

Either with closed eyes or lower your eyelids slightly so you can awaken all of your senses and not be distracted by your sight sense.

Take 3 deep breaths, feel the inhale as it enters your nostrils and the exhale as it releases through your nostrils.

Notice the quality of the air; is it cool, frosty, warm, sticky, salty…? Once you identified the quality.

Repeat: This is love

Feel your chest rise and fall with the rhythm of your breathing

Repeat: This is love

Notice the sounds, smells, touch and tastes that surround you.

After each moment of awareness

Repeat: This is love

For the next 5 minutes, allow your senses to take you on a journey

Repeat: This is love after each

After 5 minutes, gently open your eyes and take a moment to absorb what you are feeling. Take your time to transition out of any meditation.

Trust or Fear?

Trust or fear?Who would you invite into your house? Trust or Fear?

How can we trust everything is going to be okay when we are driven by fear?

Will I be able to make enough money? Or find that job? Or do that thing I want to do?

Fear wriggles into the nooks and crannies of our minds, like cancer, in almost all of our thoughts. Fearful emotions and thoughts are one of the same.

How can you possibly trust that things are going to work out?

Trust and Fear cannot sit together comfortably, without Fear, insolently sneering at Trust, jabbing at Trust with its pointed finger and blood shot eyes – “see I told you so”

Trust tries hard to wriggle away from the prods and pokes of Fear, though Fear when left to its own devices, is much bigger and stronger that Trust.

Anything can trigger Fears’ presence, big and even small things – an email, a phone call, someone’s look or tone of voice, a piece of chocolate cake.

Fear shows up when gifts are presented, it eyes up the receiver seeking any evidence of disdain or disappointment.

Fear particularly enjoys dinner parties, lurking in the corners of the room scanning for the shyest or less confident. It stays away from the narcissists who control the room with their great booming voice and self-righteous attitude.

Fear leaps onto the backs of people who are on their first date; it can bounce between the two, landing in the soup only when they begin to feel at ease. Though Fear always finds its way back once each of them goes their separate ways, wondering if the other liked them as much as they liked the other.

You cannot escape from Fear. Fear grips on with claws, almost parasitic, it cannot survive if Trust steps in, especially if Trust is given center stage.

Of course, trusting Trust is random, unlike Fear, somehow Fear edged its way in long before you knew there was such a thing. Trust came in waves, diminished and undermined by Fear. Fear is oh, so powerful.

Though Trust still perseveres despite the continual onslaught of Fear, it never ceases, staying in the shadows waiting for an invitation to step forward.  See, Trust may be quieter and less obtrusive than Fear, but is based on Love; Love the most powerful emotion of them all.

It might surprise you; Fear is also created by Love but has gone awry. Fear has devoted its energy to keep you safe, if afraid, you will take fewer risks, and survive.

Unfortunately, Fear, without boundaries will consume all in its path, devouring the very thing it started out as, Love.

Are you tired of Fear? Does it consume you? Attach to you? Make decisions for you?

Who would you invite now?

I would venture to guess you if you could do it all over again, knowing the impact Fear has on you, you would have invited Trust in and slammed the door on Fear.

Next time you invite someone in, step back and pause, before opening the door, and then decide who you let into your home.

 

Recipe: Leaning into Fear – 5 minute Meditation

This meditation is meant to face your fears head on, once you face them, their power diminishes and then trust has space to emerge.

When fearful our instinct is to run rather than running, lean into fear, invite it in.

I would recommend for those who are dealing with a trauma, do this meditation with the support of a professional as it may elicit powerful emotions.

For those where there is no trauma linked to this fear, go about this gently

 

Starting now

Either sitting cross legged on the floor or in a chair, with your spine straight and eyes closed, or open if you choose to keep your eyes open look with soft gaze just above the periphery of your vision. Be comfortable. Take a moment and prepare yourself.

With your hands resting on your thighs, begin with 3 deep breaths – note the coolness of the breath as it enters the tips of your nostrils and the warm air as it releases through your mouth or nostrils

Feel the ground or the chair underneath you – become increasingly aware of your feet as they touch the ground.

Notice how your hands feel against your thighs – heavy? tingly? soft?…

Become aware of sounds in the distance, just notice, then come back to your breath.

Using your 5 senses to keep you grounded as you continue on with this exercise – knowing that you can come back the grounding part of the meditation at any point.

Now ask yourself “what is it that I am afraid of?” Invite the fear in as you breathe in

Then bring your full attention to the sensations that are coming up for you as you sit with this fear

Are there areas in your body where the sensations are stronger? What does it feel like? Check in and see how your mind is reacting.

Then as you inhale allow those feelings to gently circle around you and with each exhale let it go into the external world where it belongs

If it is getting to be too much then come back to concentrating on your breath and grounding yourself by feeling your body pressing against something

Continue on for 5 minutes or longer if you wish

Keep coming back to this, especially if you are feeling a fearful emotion and/or physical sensation – anxiety, nervousness, butterflies, racing heart, short of breath, hard knot in your belly, rapid thoughts, overwhelmed, stressed, angry…

To disinvite fear or minimise fear based emotions, first, face them and then they eventually diminish.

Namaste

To have or to hold

to have or to hold

To Have is to grasp, to attach, to fear losing and if lost, you will be lost.

To Hold is to embrace, in your hands, your heart, your arms and if lost, you will be sad, but still whole.

Having is possessive, powerful and wrought with jealousy.

Holding is loving, liberating and free from anxiety.

To Have is to clutch tight to loved ones, jobs, homes, possessions, where peace can never be realised, nothing remains the same.

To Hold is to live with an open mind, liberated, without judgment, where we find peace.

Having is eating swiftly and living intensely, in case time runs out.

Holding is moving and sitting with ease, knowing each moment is precious.

To Have is desperate, angry and unloving.

To Hold is sweet, soft and delicious.

To Have or to Hold?

You decide.

 

Recipe for Having or Holding:

Take a pebble, place it in your hand, and turn your palm towards the ground.

To prevent the pebble from falling, you have to close your grip, hold tightly.

Over time your hand will tire, your fingers will ache. Eventually you will have to turn your hand around with the palm facing upwards.

Now open your fingers, see the pebble remains, but without the tension.

You are holding the pebble with an open, relaxed hand.

Notice the physical difference between Having and Holding.

To Have, creates tension and stress, to Hold is relaxing and peaceful.

To Hold allows you have the things you want in your life without being consumed by them.

Is it time for you to open your hand and release the grasp of some things in your life?

Now play the video

 

Taking it personal

taking it personalTaking things personal

Let’s talk about the impact other’s moods have on us.

It is without doubt most of us don’t like it when someone is irritable towards us.

It bothers us, it feels like we contributed to the bad mood, we take it to heart… take it personal.

As a result you try a variety of strategies to appease that person with apologies and/or complements…

Wrapping yourself into a pretzel shape in an attempt to dodge the discomfort you feel.

You might even carry the residue of the other’s mood with you, taking on responsibility, possibly questioning your own worthiness, with self-blame and guilt.

During which time the other person’s mood will inevitably shift, they forget and move on. While you remain bruised and deflated.

Why take things so personal when other’s moods usually are not about you?

It is a reflection of them, in other words it is not yours to own.

You are responsible for your moods, as they are responsible for theirs.

Taking things personal is a soul destroyer.

Next time you are in the midst of another person’s irritability, take pause and look into their eyes and speak silently.

I do not own their mood and let it go.

Loving it all

loving it all

Loving it all

Loving yourself, not just the likable parts, but also the parts that are harder to love.

The parts, which make you cringe; the parts you berate with disparaging words and want to change in a heart-beat.

It is easy to embrace the talented part of you, the good bits: those parts, which can be animated, fire up with great passion, generate a laugh, elicit social recognition or boosts your confidence.

If you frame yourself as the sum of those talented, well crafted parts, it would be easy to love yourself, there would be no embarrassment and shame because it could not thrive in such a you.

Yet that idyllic perfect you rarely exists, confined only to fairly tales, a fake fantasy land consumed by a false sense of loving.

By holding on to this superficial, unrealistic image of yourself, you cannot possibly ever truly love yourself.

The one-dimensional you, allows for a compartmentalization of parts, which reflects the negative and positive aspects of yourself. The favoured parts allow love in; in sharp contrast to the bad parts, which trigger the daggers drawn with a vengeance blocking any love.

It is shallow to love only parts of yourself, it is love all, or love nothing.

Isn’t it time to allow love, to love it all

Are your eyes open?

eyesopenDo you see the beauty in front of you?

A child in your arms?

A lover/companion who sits beside you holding your hand?

A sunset/sunrise that paints the skies with pink and purple hues?

A white sheet blowing in the breeze?

Are your eyes open?

To a moment of joy?

To a word which is spoken that touches you deep within?

To a parent whose eyes are saddened as they leave you?

To someone who is suffering, eyes reddened with crying?

Are your eyes open?

To your inner essence?

To your own need to heal?

Your capacity to love and create?

To being more than a spectator, but engaging in your life?

Seeing your possibilities?

Are your eyes open?

To the fact that you are more, than that?

You are powerful, whimsical, and remarkable?

Open your eyes.

Seeing happens when you rest, when you stop doing and rushing.

Seeing happens after a period of creating and then pausing and staring in wonderment.

Seeing happens when you give permission to just be.

Are your eyes open?

Try my FREE ‘Seeing with your eyes open 3 minute meditation

NEW Video Course on Meditation coming soon

 

To be friends with your lover

friends-and-lovers

Inspired by a young couple, in my Sunday boxing sessions.

Are you friends with your lover?

What makes a friend?

Is it the acceptance of the idiosyncrasies of one another?

To laugh with each other.

To love being and doing together, whether it is exercising, eating, watching TV, walking down the road.

Loads of silliness and play.

Being at ease, with long periods of silence, with no words necessary.

To speak, not afraid of judgment, or that it will be used against you at a later time.

To be friends with your lover.

Is the glue that cements the relationship, it gives it a childlike quality where you can be your true self.

To give and take, without expectations.

To be friends with your lover.

Feels like a warm woolly blanket wrapped around you on a cold winters night.

The touch is gentle and loving, without ulterior motives, but as a reminder they are present.

Your skin absorbs the touch, as opposed to rejecting it.

How is it that some lovers are friends and not others?

To be friends with your lover

Requires a mutual respect and regard for each other.

To not take each other for granted.

Making time for each other.

Doing things together you both enjoy.

To hold each another, outside of the bedroom.

To kiss before leaving and upon returning.

Most of all play and laugh together, be silly, wrestle, box together. Practice yoga together. Walk together; eat together, lie and talk together, every day not just on holidays.

Try to be friends with your lover today.

Seriously

Seriously!!!

A group of us are sitting on chairs in a circle with our eyes closed, hands draped on our laps. Eva walks in the room a few minutes after the class has started, being lead to her seat.

“Smile, you look so serious”, she says, breaking the silence.

All of us broke out into an explosion of laughter.

Eva, has dementia, she has no idea what this class is, which she attends religiously every week.

What she does observe is the silence and serious atmosphere. 

Seriously, concentrating on our breath.

Seriously, following the teachers instructions, including her expressions.

Seriously, entering into a serious yoga regiment.

Eva continued on talking loudly about all a sundry during that yoga class.

She commented about our cat and cow pelvic movements, referring to our chairs as the ‘naughty chairs’.

She mooed and meowed during the sequence of stretches.

We looked at one another, for a moment and then joined Eva and started mooing, meowing and roaring like a lion.

Our raucous laughter filled the room and the corridors.

All my yoga preparation fell to the wayside, moving any way our bodies wished, stretching, wiggling our hips and laughing.

Seriously, this is not supposed to happen in yoga, is it?

Wrong! Yoga has no boundaries or rules. Most of all it does not need to be serious.

We are allowed to laugh, cry, dance, moan, moo, meow, roar and of course there is time for seriousness.

The class ended. Eva got up and kissed one of the ladies on the cheek. We all felt something had changed within us.

This change is that we all shared a special moment, where we felt free to be silly and childish, no one was judging us, we were just being us.

Find laugher in your life, surround yourself with others who laugh and most important do not take life so serious.

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Colourful love

colourful_love

Love is colourful

Is the opposite of love indifference?

Does love mean…

Anger unexpressed,

Conflict avoided,

Voices rarely rising,

Empty, emotionless eyes looking at you as you speak,

Static emotions,

Spoken words soft and dull,

Touch meaningless,

No recollection of your words,

Indifference to who you are,

Or does love mean…

Anger expressed,

Touched lovingly, passionately and lustfully,

Arguments with forgiveness,

Being seen by eyes filled with life and interest,

Heard, listened to and remembered,

Smiles that can melt your insides,

Annoyances that are spoken,

Love for who you are,

Genuine love encapsulates a spectrum of emotions, including anger,

It does not include indifference.

Ask yourself if you are being loved… or loving to…yourself or others with indifference?

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The sweetness of love

sweetnessLove is the sweetness of life.

Valentine’s demarcates a day for expressing love towards your significant other.

In love, your heart beats faster, your hands perspire, and a smile becomes tattooed to your face .

Life becomes sweeter.

I get similar sensations when I eat a bar of chocolate,

following one of my yoga classes or if I have written an inspirational piece

or when I sink into a warm bath after a physically tough day.

The sweetness is the love I am expressing to myself when I give permission to indulge, create and nurture myself.

I feel this sweetness, when I look into the eyes of a child or an animal.

A love, that has no expectations or conditions, it just is.

Are you missing sweetness in your life?

How do you know?

If your sweetness is coming from an overconsumption of alcohol, food, sugary foods and caffeine.

You may also be over- exercising, over – sleeping, over – sexing, over -thinking, over – porning, over – talking, over – socialising or over – internet surfing.

The sweetness from love feels different: ease without guilt, satisfied without being full, light, spacious, energised and at peace.

It is when you have found that thing deep inside that rocks your socks off, floats your boat, shakes your booty…

Sweetness is your creative self bursting out of the dark depths of your soul and waking you up.

It can be a jolt or a gentle nudge.

Finding your sweetness is easier than you may think,

Just listen in and your body will tell you.

Then, and only then, can you spread your sweetness to others.

Happy Sweetness Day

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RJMindbody

RJMindbody