Month: January 2017

Wasting time

wasting timeAre you wasting your time?

Often when I relax, I feel I am wasting time

Sitting and staring out the window, wasting time

Reading in the afternoon, wasting time.

Having a coffee with a friend during the day wasting time, drinking by myself even more wasteful

Meditating wasting time

Taking a nap wasting time

Watching a movie wasting time

Sleeping-in, wasting time

I am wasting time; the other side of the coin is the productive time.

When productive we are, working, writing, planning, preparing, reading for work, checking emails, responding back to people, cleaning, organizing…

During productive time, I cannot feel guilt or lazy, because I am being industrious, guilt plays no place in this kind of time.

Wasting feels like you are not doing, while being productive you are doing.

Wasting time is replete with guilt feelings, as my thoughts hammer me with what I ‘should’ ‘need to’ ‘or ‘have to do’.

Is this why I limit my wasting time? I don’t like feeling guilty.

The problem I have is, I like the wasting time activities; I like to read, sit in the sun and drink a cup of coffee. I love taking a nap during ‘working time’ and staring out the window.

Meditation is easy for me, because it is part of my job, I can call it productive time. For the majority of people sitting down to meditate might be considered wasting time.

What is wrong with wasting time? These are the times, I tend to be the most creative and at peace during these times, but that is only if I let myself be relaxed.

The problem is not taking time to relax, it is the subtext of what wasting time means in the modern world; you are idle. Wasting time rarely elicits emotions of pride either by the person being slothful or to others watching.

Yet, wasting time moments feel like I am doing something wrong, the child caught with the hand in the sweetie jar, I should be doing, instead of doing nothing.

And so…

The genius that I am decided if ‘wasting time’, connotated a negative feeling then why not just change the word to ‘spending time’. Let us see how this makes us feel.

Spending time on the couch

Spending time re-reading that novel

Spending time sitting still

Spending time in the bath

Spending time calling my mom

Think about it, spending time is what we do, we spend time at work, spend time practicing an instrument, spend time painting, spend time at the gym…

By spending time, we are being, not doing, our body is in the present, and our mind is also present.

What would you think about eliminating ‘wasting’ and ‘productive’ time, and creating one word for both ‘spending time’?

There is no longer either ‘productive or wasting time, as there is no discrimination between the two – one is bad and one is good. When you spend time it just is, a neutral statement.

Everything we do is ‘spending time’ – no judgments, no stress, no irritation… no guilt.

Let us simply change the words we use to describe what we do with our time.

Spend some time thinking about that!

 

Recipe: Spending Time Meditation

Find a quiet space, take 3 deep breaths

Repeat to yourself, ‘ I am spending time with myself”, repeat x3

Repeat to yourself, ‘ I am spending time alone’, repeat x3

Repeat to yourself, ‘ I am a spending time in stillness’, repeat x3

Repeat to yourself, ‘ I am spending time with me’, repeat x3

Take the next 5 minutes, sitting is silence, if your mind wanders into thoughts or guilt mode, simple start from the beginning, ‘I am spending time with myself’ …

Observe your guilt, or need to be doing, and come back to what you are spending time on.

No longer will you be wasting your time or being productive, spend your time living.

Time to let go find out how

Let go

How to let go.

Breathe in – ‘Let’

Breathe out – ‘go’

Pause

Breathe in again – ‘let’

Breathe out again – ‘go’

Pause

Let go, let go, let go…

Let go like you have never let go before

Let go of anxiety

Let go of pressure

Let go of resistance to letting go

Let go of the built up emotions

Let go of control

Let go of having to know

Let go of the need to prove yourself

Let go of your guilt

Let go of having to be perfect

Let go of hiding your weaknesses

Let go of anger and resentments

Let go, let go, let go…

Breathe in – let

Breathe out – go

Let go of unhealthy habits

Let go of self-deprecation

Let go of bitterness and jealousy

Let go of beliefs that do not benefit you

Let go of people who are takers, unkind and unsupportive.

Let go of thoughts, which are destructive and deplete you.

Letting go by no means is asking you to avoid these things, letting go gives you that moment of pause so you can see what it is that weighs you down, that thing that spins you in a direction away from your hearts desires.

Our lives are so precious and short; holding on to things that harm us, or require us to pretend, or be something we are not, is a waste of a life.

Letting go, is not an easy undertaking, yet the concept is simple. All it takes is:

A Pause

An inhale – ‘ let’

An exhale – ‘go’

Pause and repeat until that feeling, the impulse to remain stuck in your habitual way of reacting begins to disperse.

How will you know? Your body will relax and the weight being carried on your chest and shoulders releases its grip.

You will know, because your mood will brighten and a sense of wellbeing will envelop you.

Holding on, wraps around your body like a python; it eventually squeezes the life out of you. Think about how we pile things on, not just one thing, but also a life’s worth of things, despite our inner voice screaming…

‘Let go’, Stop‘, I don’t want this’!!!

That inner voice begging you to listen so it can catch you before it’s too late, once you hold on to something, it is difficult to extricate it from your life.

Before committing to anything whether it is yours or others moods, beliefs or requests.

Pause – take a moment, ask yourself, do I want this or can I commit?

If you decide you can’t – respond with a ‘No’. Then:

Breathe in – Let

Breathe out  – go

Then walk away with your head up high, knowing that you are free.

 

Recipe: Letting Go Meditation

Breathe in and breathe out

Breathe in and breathe out

Breathe in and breathe out

Pause

Breathe in – say ‘Let’

Breathe out – say ‘go’

Repeat… until your body softens, your minds chatter settles and your resolve is strong

Get on with your day and repeat this meditation multiple times until you let that thing go

Letting go will free you!

I am enough

enoughWhere do we start from, most begin with I want, I need, I have…

Rarely I am, I am already ok, I am whole, I am enough…

Why? Why is it so hard to wrap our head around the idea that we are enough?

Most likely because when we are in our heads, we are never enough, never ok, never whole.

Our heads create a constant wave of seeking improvement, seeking the need to excel, seeking the desire to move ahead.

The head cannot accept things as they are, it is in a continuous state of searching for more, and believe it or not it is actually doing its job.

The problem does not lie in the head; it lies in the fact that we have become reliant on the head for it all.

What about the heart, what about the gut, the feet, the hands, legs…?

Yes, what about them?

Below the head there is a vast untapped space and energy, larger than you could ever imagine, it has more intelligence than your brain can offer.

The head, particularly the neocortex, the newest part of the brain, knows very little, though we place such faith in it knowing it all.

It is very much like asking a two-year-old what the meaning of life is; two-year-olds haven’t lived long enough to even understand that question.

Below the head is where the real knowledge is; it is the wisdom of billions of years of being alive.

Though where are most of us, in our heads?

Looking for guidance from a brain that can only receive and regurgitate information that is handed to them, the intelligence that has depth and credence is below the head.

So, when you repeat to yourself, ‘I am enough’, your head rebels against the idea you can possibly be enough because the head fears complacency. If you buy into being enough, the brain, triggers, feelings of discomfort, boredom and dissatisfaction throughout your body.

The head is pushing you to keep moving.

Now step below the head enter into your heart space and your gut, leaving the head alone, your body invites the warmth and love, creating a sense of calm.

Below the head, it knows you are enough because it has it all in hand. It knows who and what you are, it knows of your potential, it knows your strengths and weaknesses and so on.

Below the head, knows and will guide you not to improve upon what you are, but will expose you to who you are already. By removing the voices, which tell you, you are not good enough… not pretty enough…not thin enough… not smart enough…not enough.

Those voices are your head speaking, so you can keep trying harder, keep on keeping on, leaving your head spinning, never feeling ok, never feeling whole… never feeling enough!

When your body speaks, it says, you are enough, look inside and see. You are just right, look inside and see.

Your head is just doing its job to keep you alive, its job is not to bring meaning to your life, or help you find joy…

Your heart, gut, feet, legs, arms… are the ones who will assist you.

Take a look below the head and see.

You will see you are enough.

 

Recipe: I am enough meditation

Closing your eyes or looking towards something with a soft gaze

Take 3 deep breaths, through the nose

Then as you inhale say silently or out loud ‘I am’

Exhale, ‘enough’.

Repeat for 5 minutes or more.

Use this mantra as your focal point when your mind wanders off

As well as the mantra to communicate to your subconscious, that you are enough.

You are enough!

Joy

JoyAre you joy deficient?

Joy is easily found in the eyes of children, but rarely in the eyes of adults.

A child’s eyes twinkle with delight at the slightest thing, adult’s eyes remain fixed and dim.

Of course adults do experience joy, but how often?

Rarely, so infrequently that they remember the details of their handful of joyful moments, while children with soon forget theirs, due to joy overload.

Why are children the fortunate ones to experience joy, not just once in awhile, but all the time?

It does not seem fair.

A childhood lasts for about 12 years, before the temperamental, wacky adolescence.

12 Years!!! Think about that, if our average lifespan is 75 years, 63 of them are spent either joyless or with brief glimpses of joy.

It does not seem fair that children, who incidentally don’t remember a bulk of their childhood, get the privilege of a limitless supply of joy.

What is wrong with this picture?

Let us look at what joy is. We know it feels good; it is one of those pleasant emotions, the ones that make us happy, the kind of feeling that warm our hearts, send blood rushing into our faces, lifting the corners of our mouths and squinting our eyes.

Joy makes us want to dance the jig, skip, run around in circles, scream at the top of our lungs, and laugh raucously so all can hear.

Joy takes you by surprise, it cannot be planned or plotted, and it grabs you when you least expect it.

Joy is felt at first in the heart and emanates throughout the body, expanding to the feet, hands and head. Joy never begins in the head.

Joy is not a thought, it is a feeling, so profound that it is, what gives life its meaning. When you feel joy, you know why you are alive… there are no questions or doubts, it just feels right.

Think of children, they live without questioning the purpose of life, they live in their bodies, they move, jump and shake, laugh without embarrassment. When they feel joy, they feel it, hold it and express it.

Children’s hearts are always open, they are not afraid to be themselves, they have not yet began to close off from the world, hiding behind layers of protective shields. Children just do what they do really well… feel joy.

Let us learn from children, remember when we were children once as well.

Open your hearts, shake like mad, dance as if no ones watching, get out of your head, laugh at yourselves… see life as a continual stream of joy.

To open your heart, you will have to face the ickyness first; the hurt, grief, sadness… then and only then joy can emerge. If you try to side step the painful stuff, then joy will stay put.

But once joy reemerges, fresh and wiped clean, you will know why you are alive.

Joy!

 

Recipe: Opening your Heart Meditation 5 – 10 minutes

This meditation brings you into your emotion centre, the heart.

The area where we feel love… sadness… hope… gratitude…inspiration… grief…compassion… joy…hurt

Though our emotions are experienced in other areas of the body – the heart is the centre

By placing your hand on your heart, feel the rhythm of your heart beating the flow of your breath as it enters your lungs and the release of tension when you empty your lungs

This simple gesture of feeling in can create a deeper intimacy with your inner emotions.

To begin:

Sitting on the floor with your spine straight and eyes closed. If you are unable to sit on the floor, use a chair. Be comfortable. Take a moment and prepare yourself.

Begin by taking 20 deep breaths… placing your hand on your chest… as you inhale breath into your chest and rib cage. Allow the Sternum to rise.

Feel the sensation around the heart… whatever comes up for you…just sit with it… do not judge it or analyze it.

Once completing the 20 breaths.

Then sit still and just be aware of what you are feeling –

When ready:

Gently open your eyes and take a few moments to feel in. Becoming aware of the sensations in your heart centre and a sense of being pleasantly alert and serene.

 

RJMindbody

RJMindbody