Month: February 2016

Listening with intention

listening1Listening with intention

Take a moment, close your eyes and listen.

Listen with the intention to the sounds outside yourself without the chattering in your head.

Listen to the music, cars driving past your window, the voices of children as they play.

Listen to the planes flying overhead, the TV in the other room, the washing machine on spin cycle.

Listen to the wind outside your window, the coffee steaming as it brews, the clicking of the keypad next to you.

Listen to the sound of someone’s heavy walk, your partners sniffing, and the voice apologizing for disturbing you.

Listen to the silence, the palpable stillness, and the noise, which breaks the silence.

Listening with intention does not allow for thoughts to interfere, you are purely listening; there is no interpretations or judgments.

Listening with intention to your partner, colleague, child, parent, neighbor or boss means you step outside your self-limiting opinions, knee jerk reactions to respond, and need to defend.

Listening opens your mind to new possibilities, new ideas and a deeper connection in your relationships.

Listening with intention slows the world down and makes sense of it without the distractions of your thoughts and impulse to speak when listening is necessary.

Wiggle your toes

Wiggle your toesWiggle your toes.

Take a moment and take a look at your feet.

Your feet are an often forgotten part of the body; after all, they are so far away from the head.

The feet hold you up, keep you from falling, and provide the basis to walk.

Our movements would be greatly curtailed without feet.

Instrumental in movement and sensing surface changes are the toes.

Imagine not having toes, if they were rigid, there would be no way to walk or stand without assistance.

The feet and toes are essential for our overall wellbeing.

You may be wondering why I am preoccupied with the feet, and particularly the toes?

It’s simple, the toes actually provide us with the freedom to thrive and grow in life. Here’s why:

The toes represent a metaphor for living life with a purpose.

Our toes serve as a reminder of what is important, what you need to focus on in your work, home life and help with stress reduction.

Our toes provide a secret structure for getting through the day.

I like to think of it this way as a ‘TOE’ challenge.

The ‘T’stands Time Wasters: how often do we get distracted by stuff we don’t ready need to do?

The ‘O’ represents that you have an Option to decide to action something or decide not to action – it’s your choice.

The ‘E’ is for those Essential tasks that you simply have to do.

So by relinquishing the time waster stuff, placing the optional tasks on the shelf to revisit at a later time and choosing what is essential, you will grow in ways you could never of imagined. All thanks to your toes.

The key to reducing stress is to remove the time wasters, park those things you are not fully sure of and only choose what is essential.

Next time you are faced with a mountain of tasks, use your toes to help reduce the heavy load.

Just pause for a moment before taking on another task, wiggle your toes and ask what do my toes telling me?

Is this a Time waster?

What Options do I have?

Is it Essential?

Next time you are faced with a opening your email or switching on social media.

Wiggle your toes and remember the ‘TOE’ challenge.

It will help you to take rational decisions and achieve what it is you want.

The secret wiggle gives you a moment of pause, to choose what it is you want.

Loving it all

loving it all

Loving it all

Loving yourself, not just the likable parts, but also the parts that are harder to love.

The parts, which make you cringe; the parts you berate with disparaging words and want to change in a heart-beat.

It is easy to embrace the talented part of you, the good bits: those parts, which can be animated, fire up with great passion, generate a laugh, elicit social recognition or boosts your confidence.

If you frame yourself as the sum of those talented, well crafted parts, it would be easy to love yourself, there would be no embarrassment and shame because it could not thrive in such a you.

Yet that idyllic perfect you rarely exists, confined only to fairly tales, a fake fantasy land consumed by a false sense of loving.

By holding on to this superficial, unrealistic image of yourself, you cannot possibly ever truly love yourself.

The one-dimensional you, allows for a compartmentalization of parts, which reflects the negative and positive aspects of yourself. The favoured parts allow love in; in sharp contrast to the bad parts, which trigger the daggers drawn with a vengeance blocking any love.

It is shallow to love only parts of yourself, it is love all, or love nothing.

Isn’t it time to allow love, to love it all

Feeling ill at ease

feeling ill at easeFeeling ill at ease.

Not feeling quite right.

Hanging by string.

Floating through life, without a place to settle.

Nothing seems to fit properly.

What used to feel comfortable and free flowing, now feels tight and constricting.

You might attempt to deal with it by ignoring it, remaining in state of uneasiness or fixated on the discomfort, which only amplifies the discomfort.

You might think it will pass, or try to rationalize the feeling away

Feeling ill at ease often indicates you are going through a change.

A sign, whether you like it or not, you are growing

An unsettling feeling, hanging on a string, waiting to find a place to land

The not knowing where you will end up, and whether it will be all right in the long run, that is the rub.

Try my three steps to embracing change

First, acknowledging that your ill at ease feeling is genuine.

Don’t hide from the reality of the feeling, just because it’s unpleasant.

Second, allow the feeling to wash over you.

If it persists, sit with it and observe where it is taking you.

Third, be patient. Focus with a mindful observance on that ill at ease feeling.

Observe with a non-judgmental presence; be careful not to force any change. Hold on with a relaxed grasp to the emotional string, you will know when you are ready to let go.

Don’t be afraid of this impending change. It is telling you, in a gentle, loving way, there is a wind of change steering you somewhere different.

Sit, observe and see where you land.