Month: July 2014

Imprisoned by ‘IT’

IT balloon‘IT’ is disconcerting…. how often I catch myself taking things personally. Something said… something done… someone who does not call… or nor being invited…

‘IT’ is within all of us…. an experience, like jealousy, envy or shame. We are frightened to admit these feelings.. Yet, we all do ‘IT’.

‘IT’ is our secret baggage….. we carry ‘IT’ around. Pretending that ‘IT’ does not matter…. Or…. We do not care about ‘IT’.   Foolishly we convince ourselves that ‘IT’ is silly. But ‘IT’ leaves an indelible imprint on how we feel.

‘IT’ is our chain to others…. we rely on being loved. Our inner compass points outward for approval. Why can’t we trust that we are loveable? Not for others, but loveable to ourselves.

‘IT’ is impossible…. to ever shake off, taking things personally. Unless you can delve into your inner space and acknowledge your own beauty.

‘IT’ is transforming…. as you begin to open your awareness, of when you are taking things personally…admit ‘IT’…validate ‘IT’…embrace ‘IT’…then ‘IT’ will start to evaporate.

‘IT’ will lose ‘IT’s’ power over you and you will be free.

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Be Mindful..

mindful….the answer to our search for joy?

Like, many of you, I am searching for joy…those moments when time stops…worries disperse…heart beats and breath softens…muscles slacken…the world around you keeps moving while you remain still and present.

These moments are incredibly precious, and so incredibly rare. We live our lives in a torrent of activity…planning…anticipating…doing. We look back at the week and wonder what did we do? Weeks become months, months become years… the same question what did we do?

We are dictated by our primitive instincts to worry, to avoid danger, to keep bettering ourselves and be preoccupied with the future. We miss out on our fundamental right – ‘that of joy’.

Our brain is conditioned to perform, as it has for thousands of years, having not caught up with the fact some of these instincts have become obsolete. These responses were essential for survival in the jungle but not for most of us today.

As we are living longer we need to conserve our energy so we can live a life of joy by remembering details, rather than them becoming a blur.

Mindfulness…the act of staying present with what you are doing, thinking and feeling is surely the only way to take control of your life?

This week, take a moment each day to allow yourself to be mindful… sit and take 3 deep breaths… stare out a window… pause and just be… absorb a good book…. eat more slowly… listen to relaxing music….

In my classes and on my Facebook posts this week I will be introducing some techniques and tips on how to incorporate mindfulness in your daily life.

What is family anyway?

DSC_0120Whilst celebrating Independence Day at the weekend with my yoga family and friends, my natural family, 3500 miles away in the US, was celebrating my younger sister’s birthday.

On this, the 2nd anniversary of my move to London, so much has happened. I have straddled both continents trying to make sense of not being close to my family.

I have found that family is not limited to my blood family. Since moving away, I have begun to realise that our family extends beyond what we define as our family.

We are all on this planet together…the cashier at Supermarket… the lady who walks her 3 dogs everyday… my Facebook friend from Nigeria… my Alzheimer’s chair yoga group… my Brentford yoga group… my spinning teacher….in other words ‘everyone’.

Believing our love can only be shared with one specific family group results in frustration and never ending disappointment. If we only recognise that our family is limitless, our capacity to love is also limitless, then the family pressure evaporates.

As a culture we need order, knowing who we can call our family, we think this provides us with a sense of security. Ironically this gives us a false sense of security. Acknowledging that we are part of universal  family of all living things, is the essence of our safety

Thank you for being part of my family.

Seeking what?

SeekingHuman’s are seekers by nature…as cave people we sought food and shelter…today or in the Western culture we seek more money…a better a job…a bigger house… While these are all material things some of us have gone in the other direction of simplifying our lives and searching for the meaning of life through meditation, yoga and reading spiritual books.

There is no right or wrong as a seeker…we are just seeking.

I know I find myself getting excited when I have something I am working towards, if there is a lull, I find myself getting agitated, bored and then I begin seeking again…maybe seeking refuge from boredom.

An interesting observation is once we get what we want we are back on the gravy train of seeking again. Does it ever stop? Or a better question is, should it stop?

How often have you told yourself, that you will be happier when you got that thing done or accomplish that goal…then you got there and you were still not happy or it was short-lived.

Maybe, just maybe…we have to accept we are seekers, this is wired in us…we will seek until we die.

I kind of like the idea that I will be seeking something throughout my life, it gives life vibrancy…

The seeking is the searching without needing to have a finality…it keeps us on our toes.

For me the search for happiness…will persist…I will seek out activities…people…moments…music…art…travel throughout my life.

If I found happiness…then the seeking stops and then what?